CATS PARODY!!!
by Snuffles Padfoot
Summary: My sisters and I make the Jellicles do a parody of CATs! Yes, We have switched around all the parts! PLEASE, READ AND REVIEW! We own NOTHING! It's funny, really! Second Chapter up!
1. Cast list and first part of Jellicle Son...

Catnip: Hello!!!!  
  
Munk: Another parody writer?!  
  
Catnip: Yes!  
  
All: *coregraphed panic*  
  
Bast: Hi!  
  
Cass: Who are you?!  
  
Bast: Catnip's twin sister!  
  
All: *more choreographed panic*  
  
Ena: Hello! I heard a parody was going on here.  
  
Bast+Catnip: SIS!!!!  
  
Ena: Hi!  
  
All: *choreographed panic*  
  
Catnip: Here is the cast list!!!  
  
Plato: What are we doing?  
  
Bast: CATs~ the musical.  
  
All: ?????  
  
Part……….actor  
  
Misto………Quaxo  
  
Quaxo……...Tumble  
  
Tugger……...Plato  
  
Munk………Misto  
  
Old D………Skimble  
  
Rumpus……..Mungo  
  
Pounce………Asparagus  
  
Tumble……..Rumpus  
  
Plato……….Alonzo  
  
Mungo…….Old D  
  
Skimble…….Coricopat  
  
Asparagus….Munk  
  
Alonzo…….Gus  
  
Gus……….Tugger  
  
Coricopat….Gus  
  
Bustophor…Pounce  
  
Bomb……..Jemina  
  
Demi……...Etcetera  
  
Vicki………Tantomile  
  
Jemina…….Griz  
  
Griz………Bomb  
  
Cass……….Rumpleteazer  
  
Jelly………Demeter  
  
Jenny……..Cass  
  
Electra……Jenny  
  
Etcetera….Jelly  
  
Exotica…..Vicki  
  
Tantomile...Electra  
  
Rumple…..Exotica  
  
All: ????????  
  
Catnip: We start now!!!!!  
  
1 Jellicle Songs for Jellicle Cats  
  
*silence*  
  
Catnip: ETCETRA!  
  
Etc: What?  
  
Catnip: Hurry up! You're playing Demi!  
  
Etc: Oh, yeah…  
  
*Etcetera runs out onto the stage, then runs over to the pipe as a light passes over her. Several other cats roll out onto stage.*  
  
Misto: *stands* Are you blind when you're born?  
  
Pounce: I can't see!  
  
Etcetera: Can you see in the dark?  
  
Tumble: No, I'm blind, remember?  
  
Bast: Stop it…  
  
Coricopat: Dare you look at a king?  
  
Cat: CORI! *glomps Cori*  
  
Ena: CAT! Off the stage! I didn't glomp Misto, so you can't glomp Cori!  
  
Cat: *lets go of Cori and stalks off the stage*  
  
Cori: Air….  
  
Munk: Would you sit on his throne?  
  
Plato: Can you say of your bite that it is worse than your bark?  
  
Bast: *hiss*  
  
Ena: Now, now, no hatred.  
  
Bast: *hiss*  
  
Ena: *thwap*  
  
Bast: Owwww.  
  
Gus: Are you cock of the walk…  
  
Pounce: Bock bock boccck!!  
  
Cat: Pounce, I'm warning you…  
  
Bomb: When you're walking alone?  
  
All: Because Jellicles are and Jellicles do,  
  
Jellicles do and Jellicles would,  
  
Jellicles do and Jellicles can  
  
Jellicles can and Jellicles would  
  
Tumble: Do the boggie…  
  
Pounce: Do the boogie…  
  
Ena: *thwap* *thwap*  
  
Tumble+Pounce: Owwww.  
  
Demeter: When you fall on your head, do you land on your feet?  
  
Pounce: Lets see…owww.  
  
Tumble: I think that's a no.  
  
Gus: Are you tense when you sense a storm in the air?  
  
Vicki: Can Misto be Coricopat instead?  
  
Misto: Oooh! Can I?  
  
Ena: NO! Misto's mine! Back off Vicki!  
  
Misto: I'm what???  
  
Vicki: *sticks tounge out at Ena*  
  
Ena: We'll finish this later Victoria!  
  
Griz: Can you find your way blind when your lost in the street?  
  
Pounce: I'm BLIND!  
  
Bast, Ena+Catnip: *thwap*  
  
Pounce: Triple oww.  
  
Skimble: Do you know how to go to the heavinside layer?  
  
All: Because Jellicles are and Jellicles do,  
  
Jellicles do and Jellicles would,  
  
Jellicles do and Jellicles can  
  
Jellicles can and Jellicles would  
  
Electra: Can you ride on a broomstick to places far and distant?  
  
Pounce: I'm a witch!  
  
Tantomile+Coricopat: *glare*  
  
Cass+Tanto: Familiar with Candle…  
  
Jenny: With book and with bell?  
  
Tumble: Yeah, I've knocked them all of of tables in my time…  
  
Gus: Your 'time?' Hah.  
  
Jemina: Were you Whittington's friend?  
  
Pounce: Who's Whittington?  
  
Bast: Good question.  
  
Tumble: The Pied Piper's assistant?  
  
Rumpus: *somersalts* CRASH!!!  
  
Bast: *sigh*  
  
Catnip: We need a break! 10 minutes freedom everyone!  
  
All: YEAH!!!!  
  
Cat: *glomps Cori*  
  
Cori: - -;  
  
Ena: Oooh Misto!  
  
Vicki: *glomps Misto* Back off!  
  
Misto: *grin*  
  
Ena: *growl* *leaps at Victoria*  
  
*Victoria and Ena get into a cat fight*  
  
Bast: Uh!!! To the commentators! (Hint: That's you reviewers!) *runs off to find Quaxo* 


	2. Second half of Jellicle songs for Jellic...

Catnip: We'd like to thank our reviewers.  
  
Stargazer- Put yours up!!! We want to see other kitties CATs/CATs fic.  
  
Ena: We always liked reading better than writing. We want to read it!  
  
Terria- Bast: Thanks! You helped our muses to get their butts in gear. *glares at Cori, Quaxo and Misto* They were going ::very:: slow.  
  
Quaxoluver- Ena: NOOOOOOO!!!! MISTO"S MINE!!! MINE MINE MINE!!!! You can have Quaxo though…  
  
Bast: NO SHE CAN'T!! *hugs Quaxo protectively*  
  
Misto, Quaxo and Catnip: *sigh*  
  
Catnip: Forgive my sisters. They are…possessive.  
  
Rumpleteazer- Ena: I'm glad you find us funny!!!  
  
Catnip: We do too, but we don't know how Griz is going to sing that high of a soprano…  
  
Bast: ON TOO THE PARODY!!!  
  
Jellicles: NO!!!! *sob*  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Disclaimer: We own nothing but *pools money* $5.23, and a feather boa for a tail on a CATs costume.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Catnip: ENA!!!!  
  
Ena: What?! *gets smacked by Victoria and lands on her tail end* Ow!  
  
Vic: *sticks out tongue and hugs Misto protectively*  
  
Ena: I'll get you back for that!!!!  
  
Catnip: ENA!!!!  
  
Ena: WHAT??  
  
Catnip: Macavity doesn't have a part!!!  
  
Ena: What?! *takes cast list from Cat* Hmmm….  
  
Bast: What should we do?  
  
Ena: He can switch parts with Pounce. Macavity will play Bustopher, and Pounce will play Mac.  
  
Mac: WHAT???  
  
Ena: *manacle giggles*  
  
Bast: We start NOW! RUMPUS!!! You start! And don't somersault this time!  
  
Rumpus: *clears throat* Have you been an alumnus of heaven and hell?  
  
Jelly: Are you keen to be seen when you're smelling a rat?  
  
Pounce: It's hard not to smell a rat when you are one Mom.  
  
Jelly: *aghast* POUNCIAVIL!!! I'm going to smack your tail end when I get down there young tom!  
  
Rumpleteazer: Were you there when the pharaohs commissioned the sphinx?  
  
Tumble: Dang Teazer. You must be old! Explains the way you look.  
  
Rumple: You pollicle-brained….  
  
Bast: Teazer, calm. Tumble, shuddup!  
  
All: If you were, and you are, you're a Jellicle cat  
  
Jellicle songs for Jellicle cats  
  
Jellicle songs for Jellicle cats  
  
Jellicle songs for Jellicle cats  
  
Jellicle songs for Jellicle cats  
  
Jellicle songs for Jellicle cats  
  
We can dive through the air like a flying trapeze!  
  
*Jellyorum flies out on a trapeze*  
  
We can turn double somersaults and bounce on a tire,  
  
*Alonzo pushes Jelly too hard and she gets stuck in the lights*  
  
Jelly: HELP!  
  
Catnip: Continue! We'll get her out in a minute!!  
  
Pounce and Tumble: *fall over laughing*  
  
All: *regain composer* We can run up walls, we can swing through the trees!  
  
Tumble: I Tarzan!  
  
Ena: How do you know that movie? You're a cat!  
  
Tumble: *shrug*  
  
All: We can balance on bars, we can walk on wire! *run up into chorus thing*  
  
Jellicles can and Jellicles do  
  
Jellicles can and Jellicles do  
  
Jellicles can and Jellicles do  
  
Jellicles can and Jellicles do  
  
Jelly: HELP!! SOMEONE!! I'M STUCK HERE!!!!  
  
All: Jellicle songs for Jellicle cats  
  
Jellicle songs for Jellicle cats  
  
Jellicle songs for Jellicle cats  
  
Jellicle songs for Jellicle cats  
  
Queens (minus Jelly): Can you sing at the same time in more than one key?  
  
Toms: Duets by Rossini and Waltzes by Strauss?  
  
Pounce: Duets by what???  
  
Bast: Some famous musician. I think…  
  
Pounce: Oh…  
  
All: Can you (as all cats do) begin with a C?  
  
Cass: *hits a "C" note*  
  
All excluding Cass: MY EARS!!!!  
  
Cass: Thanks a lot.  
  
All: That always successfully brings down the house? *pieces of ceiling fall down as Jelly tries not to fall* Jellicle cats are queens of the night!  
  
Pounce: What about us Toms???  
  
Toms: Yeah!!  
  
Ena: QUEEN POWER!!!  
  
Queens: Yeah!!!!  
  
All: Singing at astronomical heights!  
  
Pounce: Just like Mom!  
  
Jelly: Shuddup. *hanging onto the fake moon*  
  
All: Handling pieces from the 'Messiah'  
  
Hallelujah, angelical Choir  
  
The mystical divinity of unashamed felinity  
  
Round the cathedral rang 'Vivat'  
  
Life to the everlasting cat!  
  
Feline, fearless, faithful and true  
  
To others who do-what  
  
Jellicles do and Jellicles can  
  
Jellicles can and Jellicles do  
  
Jellicle cats sing Jellicle chants  
  
Jellicles old and Jellicles new  
  
Jellicle song and Jellicle dance  
  
Jellicle songs for Jellicle cats  
  
Jellicle songs for Jellicle cats  
  
Jellicle songs for Jellicle cats  
  
Jellicle songs for Jellicle cats  
  
Practical cats, dramatically cats  
  
Pragmatical cats, fanatical cats  
  
Oratorical cats, Delphicoracle cats  
  
Skeptical cats, Dispeptical cats  
  
Romantical cats, Pedantical cats  
  
Critical cats, parasitical cats  
  
Allegorical cats, metaphorical cats  
  
Statistical cats and mystical cats  
  
Political cats, hypocritical cats  
  
Clerical cats, hysterical cats  
  
Cynical cats, rabbinical cats  
  
Pounce: *blink*  
  
Ena: At the bottom, we'll give you the dictionary definiton for all those words.  
  
Tumble: *blink*  
  
Bast: Let's stop here!!!  
  
All: YIPEE!!!  
  
Catnip: She meant 10 minute break.  
  
All: Dammit.  
  
Ena: REVIEW!!!!!! *big Jemina eyes*  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Bast: I'm sure you all were wondering what in the name of the Everlasting Cat half those words in the last section were, I have my trusty dictionary! *pulls out large book*  
  
Catnip: That's a thesaurus.  
  
Bast: I can't find my dictionary, okay? Let's see…  
  
Practical~ Sensible, realistic  
  
Dramatical~ (could only find drama…) production, play…actor/actress maybe?  
  
Pragmatically~ sensible, logically  
  
Fanatical~ obsessive, dedicated  
  
Delphi coracle~ No idea…  
  
Skeptical~ disbelieving, doubtful  
  
Dyspeptically~ No idea….  
  
Romantical cats~ Take a wild guess…  
  
Pedantically~ laboriously  
  
Allegorical~ figurative symbolic  
  
Metaphorical~ same as above  
  
Statistical ~ I think we can guess…  
  
Cat: Do it for the mathematically challenged!  
  
Bast: Like you? *ducks civics book* Okay…sticking to the facts, the statistics  
  
Mystical ~ mysterious  
  
Political ~ Well no duh…  
  
hypocritical ~ insincere two-faced  
  
Clerical ~ religious, accounting  
  
hysterical ~ hilarious, out of control  
  
Cynical~ pessimistic mocking  
  
rabbinical ~ *shrug*  
  
NOW, REVIEW!!!!!!!!!! 


End file.
